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Liu points to his own experience—when he was younger, he thought being Asian was literally the worst thing that ever happened to him. It affected me, too. Growing up, I was surrounded by white people—in school, on TV, in magazines and in advertisements. I did date an Asian guy for two years in university, but shortly after we broke up, I went right back to dating non-Asian men. When I entered my mids, though, things started to change. As I spent more time with my elders and became more comfortable in my own skin, I became more and more proud of my Chinese roots.
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Read more It's a never-ending internal dialogue that adds complexity and confusion to aspects of life that are already turbulent — and dating is where it hit me the hardest. I couldn't shake the feeling that I was working against preconceptions and presumptions when dating people outside my race. It felt like I had to overcome barriers that my non-Asian friends didn't have to, and that cost me a lot of confidence over time. I'm in a relationship now, and my partner is white. Talking to her about the anxieties I experienced around dating, it's easy to feel like my concerns were caused by internalised racism and problematic stereotypes that I projected onto the world around me.
You hear something like that and people still wonder why Asian guys want to go around dating bunch of white girls? There are usually two ways people respond. One group of people just blindly accepts what the other person says and lets the other person write the narrative of their story. And you know what?